On a group of beautiful deserted islands in the middle of nowhere, the following people are suddenly stranded by, as you might expect, shipwreck:
2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman
2 French men and 1 French woman
2 German men and 1 German woman
2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman
2 English men and 1 English woman
2 Bulgarian men and 1 Bulgarian woman
2 Japanese men and 1 Japanese woman
2 Chinese men and 1 Chinese woman
2 American men and 1 American woman
2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman
One month later on these same absolutely stunning deserted islands in the middle of nowhere, the following things have occurred:
One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman.
The two French men and the French woman are living happily together in a ménage a trois.
The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of alternating visits with the German woman.
The two Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman is cleaning and cooking for them.
The two Bulgarian men took one long look at the endless ocean, and another long look at the Bulgarian woman, and started swimming.
The two Japanese men have faxed Tokyo and are awaiting instructions.
The two Chinese men have set up a pharmacy, a liquor store, a restaurant a laundry, and have got the woman pregnant in order to supply employees for
The two American men are contemplating the virtues of suicide because the American woman keeps endlessly complaining about her body; the true nature of feminism; how she can do everything they can do; the necessity of fulfilment; the equal division of household chores; how sand and palm trees make her look fat; how her last boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her nicer than they do; how her relationship with her mother is improving and how at least the taxes are low and it isn't raining.
The two English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman.
The two Irish men have divided the island into North and South and set up a distillery. They do not remember if sex is in the picture because it gets
sort of foggy after the first few litres of coconut whisky. But they're satisfied because, at least, the English aren't having any fun.
IT MAKES YOU PROUD TO BE BRITISH
Only in Britain… can you get a pizza to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in Britain… do supermarkets make sick people walk to the back of the shop to get a prescription while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in Britain… do people order battered mars bars, chips and a diet coke.
Only in Britain… do we spend thousands of pounds on a car then leave it on the drive and have a cheap flymo and a pile of old junk in the garage.
Only in Britain…. do banks leave the front doors open and chain the biro’s to the counter.
Only in Britain… do we buy hot dogs in packs of ten and rolls in packs of eight
Only in Britain… are there handicap parking spaces in front of an ice skating rink.
MORE INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT BRITS
3 Brits die each year testing to see if a 9v battery works by putting it on their tongue.
142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all the pins from new shirts.
58 Brits are injured each year by using a sharp knife instead of a screwdriver.
31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.
19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.
18 Brits suffered serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
5 Brits were injured last year involving accidents with out of control scalextric cars.
And finally…. In 2000 8 Brits fractured their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet
AREN’T YOU PROUD YOUR BRITISH ?
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